Heroin soul

It was like getting off heroin,
 My brain didn't want it,
 But my body felt in need
 Maybe one day I will understand why,
Everything I love seems to be the death of me,
And I try to run away,
Try to stay alive,
 But as I divide, ride, walk, hide,
 I feel a different kind of dead,
A dead from the inside,
 Inconforminability.
 A state of empty breathing,
 Empty living,
 A slow way of walking to the other side.
The side held by souls,
Empty souls,
 Inconformidable souls.
 Souls like mine,
That have run out of love,
Run out of light,
 And too afraid to search,
Because to lose the little there is to be left Would be The true end.

I cry sometimes.

Sometimes I cry for my soul,
 I have long forgotten the joys of my heart,
The passions of my brain,
The beat of my mind,
The thoughts inside my heart.

I had forgotten ,
I can cry.
Life drew me colored lines,
Endless lines,
 But that just got me lost,
At the begining I saw a path,
 A lightfull path,
 Now I see the truth.
Its just a contium of dots,
Endless dots That guide me nowhere
 Because I have now realized There is really nowhere to go.